Practically everything I do to a girl is designed in some way to make her feel more and more owned. A huge part of that is denying her things she’d taken for granted before.
A few things spring to mind:
Eye contact restrictions
Not allowing her on the furniture
Feeding her on the floor
Physical restrictions (bondage)
But to really make her feel owned, you must go well beyond this. The restrictions in and of themselves provide some reinforcement that what once were her rights are now privileges, and exist at my pleasure, but the real magic comes in hammering these points home.
Speech restrictions can be further demonstrated by making her wear a gag, to be removed only when I say so. Feeding her off the floor can be enhanced by WHAT you feed her (for example, your scraps), or what she eats out of (such as a dog bowl).
Bathroom restrictions usually involve requiring her to ask permission, but you can really hammer the idea home by refusing permission sometimes and making her suffer. Or you could go the other route: Allow her to go to the bathroom any time she wants, but lock her in a diaper with set changing times (for example, once in the morning, once at night), with tamper proof tape so she can’t sneak if off and on. Things get REALLY interesting if she has to go to work 😉
Physical restrictions can be made more interesting by locking her into uncomfortable positions. My personal favorite is a collar locked to a chain high enough that she can’t lie down, and then leaving her for the night. Or the environment can be used to your advantage. Too hot, too cold, water dripping on her… really, the sky’s the limit here. The point I’d be making here is that her comfort is a PRIVILEGE, to be granted or removed at my pleasure.
But it’s even in the littlest things that I do. Clamps on her tits, choosing difficult shoes for her to wear when we go out, locking her hands together, making her do her chores with a dildo up her cunt and punishing her if it falls out, the casual way I grab her and manhandle her or squeeze her nipples as I’m passing by. Even just ignoring her and treating her as part of the furniture. The real feeling of ownership comes in my day-to-day casual treatment of her. I make her slavery a normal part of every normal day. It’s simply her reality.
In everything I do, my message is clear: I can make things better or worse for her, and she has no recourse, because she’s my property. I’ll do things to punish. I’ll do things because I’m a sadist. I’ll do things just to prove a point. But one thing remains constant, and one thing I make SURE she is reminded of every single day: I do things because it is my right as her owner.
After 2 days of
reinforcement learning (running the vacuum for 30 mins at a time,
having the cat play with it while it’s off), I turned the vacuum on this
morning and he didn’t even react. At all. Good!
The final test: Actually vacuuming around Kit (with the machine on):
He only got a little nervous after I vacuumed really close for awhile. That, too, should fade with repetition.
So there you have it: A cat unafraid of the vacuum cleaner!
So given my penchant for training, and the fact that I’ve essentially been given a blank slate to work with, I’ve started training Kit.
I’ve yet to meet a cat that isn’t shit scared of the vacuum cleaner. This got me thinking: What if a cat weren’t afraid of it? This is my training goal with Kit.
Memory stores two connected things: “facts” and emotions (“facts” in the loose sense of the word). We always store both together, giving every fact an emotional context. Retrieving the fact also retrieves the emotional context, such that you actually experience the emotion while remembering. It’s been shown that you can deprogram an emotion tied to a fact by suppressing the part of the brain that stores the emotional memory while remembering. The act of remembering erases the old memory, processes it, then stores it again. So if you interrupt the emotional write, the fact loses its emotional charge (you can also interrupt the fact write, with amusing results).
Anyway, since Kit has no knowledge of vacuum cleaners, the goal is to avoid the negative emotional memory to begin with.
Step 1: Normalization
I turned on the vacuum for a second while Kit was some distance off. He was startled, looked up, but the sound had stopped so he went back to what he was doing. I repeated the process every few minutes, until it was such a normal occurrence that he didn’t pay it any heed at all. I also started ramping up the duration of the sound, until I had it on for a good 30 seconds while he completely ignored it.
Step 2: Familiarization
He had no reason to pay any attention to the vacuum, but that would become unavoidable the next time I cleaned the house, so he has to be used to the look of this thing, and the rumbly noise it makes as it rolls around. First, I just rolled it around the house until he got bored watching. Then I sat down and rolled it to and fro. He eventually came up to me to figure out what I was doing. I did a couple more strokes, then laid it down. He came up and sniffed. Then I picked it up and rolled it some more, then put it down. Eventually I had it touching him as it rolled, and finally he started batting it with his paws. Now he was ready for the next part!
With the vacuum off, I started his favorite game: Jumping around trying to catch my hand under the plastic bag. I did that with the vacuum close, and then swapped to having the vacuum itself under the plastic bag! He was a bit confused at first, but quickly learned that this is just as fun!
After a bunch of play, I dropped the vacuum rather abruptly on the ground. He didn’t even flinch. He even went out to sniff it.
Next I took out the power cord (it’s weird… even the power cord freaks out some cats), and wiggled it around until he started playing with it. I didn’t do that for long, though, because I don’t want him to learn to chew the cords!
I swapped it out for a length of rope, and he completely freaked out! I’d forgotten he’d never seen a rope before! Whoops! (cue sad trombone) So that took a good half hour of remedial play to erase his new fear 😛
The important thing is to undo the damage BEFORE he goes to sleep and permanently stores the memories.
Over the next few days I’ll be reinforcing the training. Neutral and happy memories take a lot longer to strengthen vs traumatic memories. This makes perfect evolutionary sense. It’s far more important to remember where the lion’s den is vs the place where you found a pretty flower. I’ll post on this again once I think enough foundation has been laid.
I’ve been getting a lot of requests to dominate recently. I’m laying things out here so that you’re not disappointed.
First off, I’m a real dom. I’m only interested in the real world. I don’t dom online. I don’t talk dirty online. I won’t feed your rub fuel for you. If that’s what you want, there are plenty of Tumblr doms out there who’ll be more than happy to service you, but I’m not one of them.
If you live far away from me, and relocating is an impossibility, then it won’t work. Don’t even start with me, because it’ll only end in disappointment. I can do remote in the short term, interspersed with meeting in the flesh, but ultimately that’s unsatisfying. I’m a jealous god, and I won’t have my property living away from me. Ownership is 100% or 0%.
If you don’t have a petite body type, it won’t work. I know what I want, and I won’t compromise. It’s not fair to either of us to settle. Desire should be 100%, and the petite body type is what does it for me.
Your experience level DOES NOT MATTER. Period. I don’t care what you have or have not done. I do things my way, and you’ll learn my ways because I’ll train you in them. My way is what got me to the point where I’m secure in my future, and what’s good for me is good for my slave.
I don’t care how fucked up you are. I don’t care that you feel inadequate. I don’t care that you mess things up constantly. I don’t care that you get moody and depressed. I don’t care that you’re needy and keep asking the same things over and over again. I don’t care that you’re insecure, have anxiety, or cut. Those are actually the kinds of things that attract a real dom, tbh. A real dom likes to be needed. A real dom likes someone he can guide, protect, and help grow.
If you need advice, or just want to chat, the above doesn’t apply, of course. Ask away! If, however, you long for me to take you, then it will only happen on my terms. I offer the real thing, 24/7, and I’ve set up everything necessary to make it happen, for real.
So unless you’re prepared to go all the way, don’t ask.
I believe in soulmates, but not “The One.” Soulmates also come in degrees, some better matched than others. It’s a bit of a fuzzy line where someone becomes a soulmate, but it is acutely felt by both people.
A soulmate not only feels right; they just automatically contribute. You’ll have bad times, but they’ll apologize if wrong and work to fix things. They’ll be proactive. They take an interest. They are concerned about your welfare. And you’ll only find your soulmate once you’ve developed a soulmate mentality yourself.
What I’m saying is that there is no such thing as a “perfect” match. You’ll have very good matches (soulmate matches), but never perfect. This is an important distinction to make, because imperfection means that you must put effort into your relationship. Taking the traditional “perfection” based definition of soulmate is a cop out.
The cult of “The One” is a form of laziness that can take root at all stages of a relationship:
The first stage is when you’re alone. You despair that you’ll never find “The One”, and so you never bother trying in the first place. Or you just sit there waiting for prince charming to find you and sweep you off your feet.
The second stage is when you’re in a relationship. It’s not perfect, and so you conclude that he isn’t “The One”, therefore it’s beyond your control, and you’re absolved of responsibility for tending to the relationship.
The third stage is when a relationship actually IS bad and should be ended. You hold on because, after all, he’s “The One”. That’s just the reason you tell yourself. The real reason is because it seems less painful to hang on than it is to be alone again.
The fourth stage is when the relationship has ended (break up, divorce, death, etc). You dread having to find someone of soulmate compatibility again, and the sheer amount of work and patience required appears an insurmountable obstacle. Far easier to say “There’s only one soulmate, and now he’s gone” because it absolves you of responsibility for doing all the hard work of finding someone again.
So while I can understand why someone might commit suicide over heartbreak, there is no situation in which I’d say it is justified. As long as you’re still breathing, you’re being afforded the opportunity to begin anew. You don’t just throw that away.